More SILLY WEEK Fun

VERY FUNNY AND NOT AT ALL POLITICALLY CORRECT

SILLY WEEK - Farts Can Kill

THIS ONE IS VERY SILLY INDEED

SILLY WEEK Continues

The European Commission

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with"z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl

Copyright © 2005 by [SILICONHELL.COM]. All rights reserved.

HAT TIP TO ANGRY OLD MAN

SILLY WEEK - Unlucky Alf

A FEW MORE LAUGHS

BOOMERANG

ANOTHER SILLY ONE - JUST FOR LAUGHS

It's SILLY WEEK, Mr Cholmondley-Warner!

THESE TWO ARE ALWAYS GOOD FOR A LAUGH - HOPE YOU LIKE IT

PILLOW TALK #2

CLICK TO ENLARGE

HAT TIP TO GIGITS

NOT FOR PEOPLE OF NERVOUS DISPOSITIONS OR IN POSESSION OF A

MORAL COMPASS OR PRESBYTERIAN CONSCIENCE

CryBaby has written this jolly little poem to add to all the fun.

Pic 1

As Mandy crawls over, and mounts Gordon Brown
“I’ve been waiting all day” he says, as he holds Gordon down,

Concentration is important, trust me on this one,
As Mandy turns around, with Gordon’s face in his bum.

Pic 2

And then it happens, just like that, and Mandy lets it rip,
Mandy sighs and says to Gordon – you ARE full of shit,
Now get stuck in and eat it all, and don’t you dare waste any,
For our little coprophilia game, is just one of more and many.

Pic 3

You were right, that was great, now give me a big fat kiss,
Fuck off Gordon, don’t touch me, I said you were full of shit.

Dedicated to Gigits Pic

The Resignation of Gordon Brown

HAT TIP TO VotR

Bet That You Look Good On The Dancefloor

HAT TIP TO DAZED & CONFUSED

NASTY STUFF - REAL LABOUR!

This copy of a Lefty activist's blog post exposes in all it's gory detail, the vile sickness at the dark heart of the Labour Party.

HAT TIP TO RANTIN' RAB

The original blog where this appeared has removed the comment. Miller shut down his old blog and he now he has a new one at

http://newerlabour.blogspot.com/

and surprise, surprise - only Labour apparatchiks are "invited" to read his rabid frothings at the mouth!

BROWN ON PROBATION AGAIN

A BULLDOG CHEWING A WASP

Today has indeed been a good day and right now my schadenfreude gland is hyperactive and feeling very satisfied - this is an extract from an article in the Mail by James Chapman.

Gordon Brown is being given until the autumn to turn Labour's fortunes around in the wake of another by-election disaster.

Though Labour had anticipated defeat, the scale of the loss led MPs to warn that it was clear the party was increasingly unelectable in England under Mr Brown.

Labour's vote crashed to 18 per cent, with 70 per cent of those who voted for the party at the 2005 election staying at home or switching to other parties.

Ministers now expect Labour MPs to reopen questions over Mr Brown's leadership later this year, unless the party's standing improves.

Backbenchers plan to urge Cabinet colleagues to talk him into leaving 'with honour and dignity', having rescued Britain's banking system from collapse, in favour of a more electable leader.

One senior MP told the Mail that Ed Balls, one of Mr Brown's oldest allies, would be approached and urged to intervene if Labour loses another by-election in Glasgow later this year.

Labour backbenchers said the by-election campaign had tested to destruction Mr Brown's mantra of Tory cuts versus Labour investment'.

Voters ignored Labour leaflets claiming the Conservatives would scrap free bus travel and TV licences for the elderly.

With demoralised MPs now on their summer break, there appears to be little appetite for an immediate attempt to oust Mr Brown.

But rebels believe he could be persuaded to step down voluntarily after conference in September if it is clearly in the party's interests.

David Cameron hailed the victory as 'historic'. The Tory leader said voters had rewarded the party for being honest about the need to rein in public spending.

He accused Labour of running an 'utterly despicable' campaign full of allegations about policies which were 'not true'.

I can't see Blinky doing the deed but hopefully someone in NuLieBore will actually have the balls to go through with it this time. I can't see Fondlebum wanting do it either as he would rather keep McSnot in place until his precious Lisbon Treaty is ratified without the irresistable pressure to call a general election after his removal.

FULL STORY IN THE DAILY MAIL

How Not To Get Your Ass Kicked By The Police

HAT TIP TO Dr. DAVE

I am not a huge fan of Chris Rock but I just saw this over at Feed Your ADHD and I thought it was very funny - it is, however, also very true.

BIG-MOUTHED TOADY!

A TWAT

Here is a little something I received earlier from the Daily Mash. I have already sent mine off to the fucker and if anyone else would like to do the same, please feel free to copy and paste this to your email.

George.Foulkes.msp@scottish.parliament.uk

Dear Lord Foulkes,

Shut it, you trough-guzzling pigman.

Love,

[insert your name here]

Your country needs you to do this.

THE WEEKLY MASH

Suck it.

I realise, of course, that this is a joke - or is it?

I enjoyed sending it to him anyway!

DON'T TURN EU INTO ANOTHER USSR

HAT TIP TO DANIEL 1979

LABOUR TOADY NOT FIT TO SHINE THEIR BOOTS!

BELOW IS AN EXTRACT FROM an ARTICLE in The DAILY MAIL by TIM SHIPMAN.

A Labour peer caused outrage yesterday after he accused Britain's top soldier of disloyalty and helping the Taliban.

Lord Foulkes attacked General Sir Richard Dannatt for daring to speak out about the shortage of equipment for troops in Afghanistan.

He said public demands for more helicopters by General Dannatt and Sir Jock Stirrup, Chief of the Defence Staff, were 'giving succour to the enemy'.

Shadow Defence Minister Gerald Howarth said: 'It is outrageous for Lord Foulkes to accuse an outstanding general of helping to undermine the mission in Afghanistan.

'General Dannatt, a holder of the Military Cross, has not only inspired his men through his leadership, but has done more than anyone else to generate the tremendous public support which now manifests itself across the country for our Armed Forces.'

Liberal Democrat foreign affairs spokesman Edward Davey said: 'Considering this Government's failure to provide either a coherent strategy or adequate kit for the mission in Afghanistan, Richard Dannatt and Jock Stirrup have shown admirable restraint.

These robotic Labour toadies are seemingly unable to function in genuine debate and invariably resort to their last refuge of smearing and character assassination - the mark of true scoundrels. They appear to be totally oblivious to the fact that nobody believes a word they say or that anyone is unlikely to ever believe them again so when will they learn to just shut up!

FULL STORY IN THE DAILY MAIL

THE MAN JACKBOOTS BANNED TALKING COMPLETE SENSE

HAT TIP TO OPUS #6

Michael Savage found his way onto our useless ex-Second-Home Secretary's "little list" for supposedly, according to her, being a very undesirable fellow who just could not under any circumstances be allowed into Britain for precisely the same reason that Geert Wilders was not allowed to show his film and address the House of Lords. That reason seems purely to be fear of the truth, which, as we all know by now, doesn't go down too well with the Labour commies we find ourselves stuck with for the next ten months. Again, folks, although he's talking about Obamalama's America he could equally well be describing Brownarse's Britain.

ANOTHER OF GORDON'S REVIEWS

GERALD SCARFE IN THE SUNDAY TIMES


For when a picture paints a thousand words!

SHOW SOME RESPECT FOR OUR BOYS!

RAF HELICOPTER WAS MADE FROM 2 OLD CHINOOKS......

"BOLTED TOGETHER"

THE Ministry of Defence admitted last night that an RAF Chinook helicopter flown in Afghanistan has been cobbled together from the front and back of two old aircraft.

Officials earlier denied the hybrid had been operational in the Middle East.

The aircraft was made up from two others – one which crashed in 1999 and one taken from the Argentinians during the Falklands war. The two parts were fused together – a “cut and shut” technique often used illegally by dodgy car dealers – and the aircraft went back into service in 2003.

The MoD statement followed an embarrassing disclosure by former Defence Secretary John Hutton in a letter to Ian Sadler, whose 21-year-old son Jack was killed in Afghanistan in December 2007. Mr Sadler, of Exmouth, Devon, said he was told about the hybrid helicopter by a soldier who claims he had been inside it in Afghanistan within the last year and that it had two different identification numbers.

The MoD would not confirm its whereabouts. But last night a spokesperson said: “We argue it’s a good use of resources.”

Daily Express | UK News :: RAF helicopter was made from 2 old Chinooks bolted together

Shared via AddThis

This story so infuriated me when I read it, I thought I should reproduce it here.

REMIND YOU OF ANYONE?

LABOUR COWARDS AND TURNCOATS

Under threat: Gary McKinnon, pictured with mother Janis, has been abandoned

by many Labour MPs who abstained or voted with the Government

Once again, (it's every day, now), that two-faced cowardly, sneaky little shit that is jolly Alan Johnson, everyone's friendly Home Secretary who smiles jovially while inserting a knife in your back, has shown his true, spineless NuLieBore colours by refusing to intervene in the Gary McKinnon extradition proceedings. Postman Prat is plodding along toeing the Government's line at every turn proving to the public, at least, that he is not fit for leadership purpose, or much else, for that matter! This has now and for the last seven years got completely out of hand because some embarrassed bastard paid obscene amounts of money for a security system that Gary hacked as if it were a piece of crap!! Instead of looking for revenge, they should be offering him a job - God knows they need him!

Just 28 more Labour 'rebels', (I think they must go around crushing grapes or swatting insects when they're feeling rebellious), would have defeated the Government today - 28!

74 Labour MPs who had previously signed Commons motions backing Mr McKinnon or demanding a review of extradition agreements with the U.S. failed to go against the party line. Fifty-nine voted with the Government and 15 abstained.

I am posting this roll call of shame from the Daily Mail because it needs to be posted for all to see, so please feel free to repost this on your own blogs.

TURNCOATS

Diane Abbott (Hackney North and Stoke Newington), David Anderson (Blaydon), John Austin (Erith and Thamesmead), Joe Benton (Bootle), Clive Betts (Sheffield Attercliffe), Lyn Brown (West Ham), Russell Brown (Dumfries and Galloway), Richard Burden (Birmingham Northfield), Dawn Butler (Brent South), Martin Caton (Gower), Ann Cryer (Keighley), Jim Cunningham (Coventry South)

Quentin Davies (Grantham and Stamford), Janet Dean (Burton), Jim Dowd (Lewisham West), Jeff Ennis (Barnsley East and Mexborough), Hywel Francis (Aberavon), Neil Gerrard (Walthamstow), Roger Godsiff (Birmingham Sparkbrook and Small Heath), Helen Goodman (Bishop Auckland), John Grogan (Selby), Patrick Hall (Bedford), David Heyes (Ashton under Lyne), Kelvin Hopkins (Luton North), Joan Humble (Blackpool North and Fleetwood), Brian Iddon (Bolton South East), Eric Illsley (Barnsley East)

Glenda Jackson (Hampstead and Highgate), Brian Jenkins (Tamworth), Martyn Jones (Clwyd South), Sadiq Khan ( Tooting), Mark Lazarowicz (Edinburgh North and Leith), Tony Lloyd ( Manchester Central), Kerry McCarthy (Bristol East), Jim McGovern (Dundee West), Anne McGuire ( Stirling), Shahid Malik (Dewsbury), Gordon Marsden (Blackpool South), Anne Moffat (East Lothian), Madeleine Moon (Bridgend), Julie Morgan (Cardiff North), George Mudie (Leeds East)

Nick Palmer (Broxtowe), Gordon Prentice (Pendle), Joan Ruddock (Lewisham Deptford), Joan Ryan (Enfield North), Martin Salter (Reading West), Andy Slaughter (Ealing, Acton and Shepherd's Bush), John Smith ( Glamorgan), Sir Peter Soulsby (Leicester South), Gavin Strang (Edinburgh East)

David Taylor (North West Leicestershire), Desmond Turner (Brighton Kemptown), Rudi Vis (Finchley and Golders Green), Lynda Waltho (Stourbridge), Bob Wareing (Liverpool West Derby), Betty Williams (Conway), Anthony Wright (Great Yarmouth), Iain Wright (Hartlepool).

ABSTAINERS

Roger Berry (Kingswood), Roberta Blackman-Woods (City of Durham), Harry Cohen (Leyton and Wanstead), Andrew Dismore (Hendon), Bill Etherington (Sunderland North), Frank Field (Birkenhead), Fabian Hamilton (Leeds North East), John Heppell (Nottingham East), Peter Kilfoyle (Liverpool Walton), Christine McCafferty (Calder Valley), Bob Marshall-Andrews ( Medway), Chris Mullin (Sunderland South), Edward O'Hara (Knowsley South), Marsha Singh (Bradford West), Mike Wood (Batley and Spen).

What a brave bunch they all are!

FULL STORY IN THE DAILY MAIL

A SERIES of UNFORTUNATE EVENTS - #94

                                

HAT TIP TO LL at VIRTUAL MIRAGE

   

It just leapt at me, Officer!!

TWO-FACED JOHNSON STRIKES AGAIN

This cowardly, sneaky little shit who didn't have the balls to challenge Gordon Brown for the leadership one month ago,(when he would probably have won), then U-turned, (some might say "lied"), about the shelving of ID Cards except on a voluntary basis, has yet again shown himself to be the slimy, spineless tosser that he is! Below is an excerpt from an article in the Daily mail written by Tim Shipman

Home Secretary Alan Johnson last night refused point blank to cap the number of immigrants coming to Britain.

And he said he does not 'lie awake at night' worrying about the population hitting 70million.

Immigration Minister Phil Woolas has pledged that the Government will not allow the population to grow to that level. But last night he was apparently undermined by his boss.

Speaking at the Home Affairs Select Committee, Mr Johnson said he would not bring in a cap because it would harm the economy, claiming the argument that immigration had made a contribution to the economy was 'irrefutable'.

'I do not lie awake at night worrying about a population of 70million,' he told the cross-party group of MPs.

'I'm happy to live in a multi-cultural society. I'm happy to live in a society where we not only welcome those coming to live and work in this country, but also where we can go and live and work in other countries.'

The Home Secretary did acknowledge the recession has made it more difficult for ministers to convince British workers who have lost their jobs that immigration is beneficial.

Last night MigrationWatch director Sir Andrew Green said: 'No wonder the political class is in such disrepute.

'Here is a new Home Secretary immediately riding roughshod over public opinion that is hugely opposed to the mass immigration which this Government is encouraging.

'For a start, how is a government that is broke going to pay for all the houses, schools and hospitals that an extra seven million immigrants will need in the next 20 years?'

So there you have it - another triumph for Labour's favourite candidate for the position of next "Dear Leader"! What a vote winner he is, the slippery hoon - I'm so glad he isn't losing any sleep!

A Frank and Accurate Assessment of the BBC

HAT TIP TO SHIBBY

This is music to my ears in a very down-to-earth sort of way. Notice how the BBC minions can't stomach the truthful assessment fluently presented to them as they try to hedge around it in the typical Lefty, smarmy way. I can't believe the uber hoon producer thought this guy would be stupid enough to pass on his contact details, (don't worry, the pigs will be round later)! The BBC are lying scumbags who work for the Government and this man has them dead to rights!

BBC NEWS - UNBIASED EDITION

No BBC News
by GrumpyOldTwat

PROUD OF YOURSELF, GORDON?

PETER BROOKES IN THE TIMES

CLIMATE CHANGE CON EXPOSED

Anthropogenic Global Warming Is A Dangerous, Ruinously Expensive Fiction

Hooray! A voice of reason. Someone unafraid to take on the AGW con, head-on.

Ian Plimer, Professor of Mining Geology at AdelaideUniversity, in his book Heaven and Earth, says:

"The hypothesis that human activity can create global warming is extraordinary because it is contrary to validated knowledge from solar physics, astronomy, history, archaeology and geology."

"I’m a geologist. We geologists have always recognised that climate changes over time. Where we differ from a lot of people pushing AGW is in our understanding of scale. They’re only interested in the last 150 years. Our time frame is 4,567 million years. So what they’re doing is the equivalent of trying to extrapolate the plot of Casablanca from one tiny bit of the love scene. And you can’t. It doesn’t work."

"I’m a natural scientist. I’m out there every day, buried up to my neck in sh**, collecting raw data. And that’s why I’m so sceptical of these models, which have nothing to do with science or empiricism but are about torturing the data till it finally confesses. None of them predicted this current period we’re in of global cooling. There is no problem with global warming. It stopped in 1998. The last two years of global cooling have erased nearly 30 years of temperature increase."

HAT TIP TO FAUSTY

PC BRITAIN - AMERICA'S VERDICT

This report says what a lot of us have been thinking for a long time.

HAT TIP TO DAZED & CONFUSED

TIME TO WAKE UP!

BIASED BBC

In case you were ever in any doubt about how biased the BBC are, with regard to the support of their NuLiebore masters, take a look at this clip of film taken from last week's edition of Question time . . .

HAT TIP TO MISH MASHER, GOT AND FAUSTY

One signal from Harriet Harman and DumbleBore immediately rushes to stifle an argument from IDS which Harperson would rather he didn't continue. Blatant control of the BBC by a senior member of the Government matched only by an equally blatant display of blind obedience by a so-called senior BBC presenter.

NIGERIAN TWAT ALERT!

MY VERY FIRST ONE!!

reply-to: augustine_daran@apnamultan.com

to: augustin_daran20@msn.com

date: Tue, Jul 7, 2009 at 3.01pm

subject: A benefiting massage

mailed by: msn.com

My good friend

I am Mr.Augustine Daran a banker in Islamic development bank.
I contacted you now on a business deal of USD$20,000.000, which I need your help to transfer the fund to your account.
The depositor of the fund died with his entire family during the Iraq war in 2004.
The customer & his entire family died, unfortunately, leaving nobody for the claim. If we make this claim, we will share it 60%/40% if you are interested reply me I will give you the full details.
I am Wait for your reply

Thanks

Augustine Daran

OH! My poor fucking aching sides!

OPEN YOUR MIND

HAT TIP TO MISH MASHER

Anti-European Eyesight Adjustment Solutions

HAT TIP TO NAPOLEON and TECHNO MYSTIC

WE THE PEOPLE NEED TO ACT NOW!

I was amazed when I first watched this video how close it is to a description of life in Labour's left wing, EU-dominated Britain. Just change a few words, like Federal, Congress, etc. ,to their British equivalents and you have a perfect account of life in the UK today and what we need to do about it.

HAT TIP TO NICKIE GOOMBA AT IT DON'T MAKE SENSE

Unexpected Help From Germany

Today as I was browsing through the papers I came across this piece of potentially very good news which had been buried almost entirely successfully by all the palaver and hoohah over Michael Jackson in the last week. Below is the article by Peter Oborne which caught my eye:

"Sixty-five years ago, heroic Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg made his claim to go down as a glorious name in German history when he led the failed 1944 assassination plot against Hitler.
Today, his third son, Count Franz Ludwig von Stauffenberg, is leading the German resistance against the Lisbon Treaty — and in the past week won a vital victory.
He secured a sensational ruling from the German constitutional court that the powers of the Berlin parliament must be significantly strengthened before Germany signs on the dotted line of the document which will create a centralised EU superpower.
This landmark decision has massive implications not just for Germany, but also for Britain.
This is because there will now be a long delay in the ratification of the Lisbon Treaty which could well string out the process until after the British general election.
This has fascinating ramifications.
David Cameron has bravely pledged a European referendum if the Treaty has not been ratified and he becomes Prime Minister.
It now looks possible that his first major drama as Tory PM would be to lead the ‘No’ camp in a referendum on the Treaty.
Of course, this might embarrass Cameron because the Tories risk a major split, with pro-Europe Ken Clarke taking up an opposing position.
But my guess is that Cameron will win a ‘No’ vote and achieve a massive victory in the war against euro-federalism."

Thankfully, Peter Oborne was not distracted by this week's completely over-egged outpouring of pseudo grief which dominated every news programme and Sky News in particular. Heaven forbid they would have to report something detrimental to the EU, the Labour Party or the Glorious Leader. It would seem that McSnot and Lord Shirtlifter of Boy may just have had their chips pissed on from a great height - couldn't happen to nicer fellows!

BALLS - A GOOD KICKING!

FROM THE DAILY POLITICS

Ed Balls is such a prize TWAT - here, he receives a well-aimed kick in the scrotum from Michael Gove.

Voice Of The Resistance - Bookmark Now

http://tvotr.blogspot.com/

The Website is being fine-tuned at the moment but it will soon be ready for launch and as soon as testing is finished, everyone who expressed an interest will be receiving their invitation to join. Please publicise this on your blogs to help spread the word as much as possible. I'd just finally like to draw your attention to the URL for The Voice Of The Resistance above.

Thank You